how I'm feeling today...

Photoghrapher: K LEo

I hate dance, really...rant

I hate dance, really. It's like a terrible irresistable lover, the kind who sends pulses up my chakra chanels with a slight touch, and leaves me bowled over in grief moments, days, years later, over and over in cycles. The kind that turns me into a sugar daddy, supporting her with all the time any money I can muster, and then plays coy with me, becoming totally illusive so I have to roam empty spaces throwing powder everywhere, as Terry O'Conner has described, until my invisible lover gets revealed. I hate dance because, after all this, and sometimes injuries, and soreness, and and and, it isn't even capable of communicating the depth of what it is in any fully consciously recognizable way. It is NOT a language. It is what it is, and subject to interpretation or not, vacancy, despite any clear intention or action on it's part. It cannot stand alone and fully transmit it's beingness in a way that is totally processable in the cerebrum, speakable, recognizable in today's rational world. Because of this, and other needs that are hungry to be fulfilled by my performing self, I'm wanting to build something equivalent to a multi-ring circus where the rings are interconnected and dance manifests in only some of them. But dance is so hungry and demanding of attention that it's hard to begin to cultivate nearly as attentive a relationship with the others. I have to sneak to do it. If only there was some sort of couple's counseling. Knowing dance she would surely entice the counselor and soon we'd have a family of three. There's no getting around her, so I may as well introduce her to the others. I hate her because I know she'll try to force them to supplicate themselves to her and they'll have to fight hard to have their own ground to thrive on. After all, she's managed to become a main component of my identity for the past near decade. She won't learn to share easily. Really, I love dance, but it's a tempestuous love that I often try to run away from. Perhaps we can learn to live happily in a balanced polyfaithful family, but it will take work, and many more blog rants like this one to get there.

Performance forms list

Compiled by me, Brian Dailey, and Angela Gronroos

-lec dem
-post show discussion
-slide show
-telling ghost stories
-workout class
-church
-any sort of class
-court
-camp fire
-infomercial
-commercial
-cooking show
-political rally
-community organizing meeting
-interview
-photo shoot
-wedding
-live customer service (eg. front desk reception, cashier)
-job orientation video
-tour
-stewardess air safety presentation